A Vacation Isn’t A Vacation Until…
…someone goes to the Emergency Room.
Oh yeah. If you have kids you all know that trips to the ER are a part of the deal. But when you have five kids, lets just say they are a regular part of my monthly planning. Pick up birthday gifts, buy milk, spend evening at hospital, wash the car…..
We’ve had trips for a broken leg, a major bump to the head, a lip laceration, a mysterious stomach illness, pneumonia, and much much more. Each comes with its own story. Here’s the most recent.
So, on our recent family trip, we decided to add HEAD LACERATION to the list.
The story is quite simple, actually. Jade and Lily were trying to close the sticky bottom drawer on the dresser in their room — upon which rested a large TV set. Said sticky drawer continued to stick. Jade and Lily, however, continued to force it, thus creating a rocking motion that sent the TV plummeting off the dresser. And, Jade (in true Jade -form) pushes her little sister out of the way and then catches the TV and thus prevents any deduction to our damage deposit. BUT, before she catches the TV it ricochets off her head. Yup, her HEAD.
So, Dave got to drive her along dark country roads in the middle of the night, following a map, to the local island hospital. They almost gave her stitches, but came away with her wound glued back together. Seen here after a day of healing:
Jade and her Head Lac
It looked worse the night before.
So, the day after her “ordeal,” Jade says to me, “Yeah, the doctor told me that I cannot shower or take a bath until the laceration heals.” And then she sorta slumps down and shakes her head back and forth.
Dave, however, sits straight up and says, “That is NOT what the doctor said.” He looks at me, shakes HIS head. Looks back at Jade and says, “The doctors said to be careful not to get the wound wet while bathing or showering.” Jade looks right back at him as if he is speaking Spanish or Farsi or Japanese. Shrugs. Then walks off. Dave looks at me and asks, “WHY DOES SHE SAY THINGS LIKE THAT?” I say, “8th grade girl.” I Shrug. And then walk off.
Over a week later and life has returned to normal. We are back into our life here in the burbs, I am buried under laundry, kids are going in different directions. One Tuesday night I head over to the junior high and pick Jade up from track practice. It was a cold, blustery day and Jade is shivering when she hops in the mini-van. I look at her and say, “OH, I am so glad that you are about to jump in the shower to warm up!”
Wait for it.
“Oh,” she replies, “I can’t shower.”
“Why,” I ask in complete innocence.
She then lifts her hair to reveal her head wound.
So she really did think Dave was speaking Spanish or Farsi or Japanese.
“Do you remember the conversation with Uncle Dave about this?”
Blank Look.
“Do you mean you have not showered since vacation?????!!!??!”
Blank Look.
“GET THEE TO A SHOWER!”
We arrive home and I say to Dave, ” Why does she do things like that?”
“8th grade girl,” he replies.
(I bet he had been carrying that one around just waiting to use it.)
